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文中词汇表达较丰富恰当，但高级词汇稍显不足；采用了简单的衔接手法，行文流畅；作者句法知识很棒，适当增加从句的使用，会取得更不错的成绩。
In China,there is a saying that"Conton Tower is slim waist".In the light of this,I will recommend Canton Tower as the first destination of my foreign friend's trip to China. Canton Tower is located in Tianhe district Guangzhou where is in Guangdong province.The condition of traffic in the city is so convenient that we can play better. In addition,it is universally acknowledged that the second highest tower in the world.There is no doubt that it is the most beautiful building that I have ever seen.By climbing the tower,we can see Guangzhou view.Therefore,when people around the world go to Guangzhou,there is no one but wants to visit it.Thanks to its beautiful and width,famous singer enjoy to holds concert in here.There are flowers square and Zhujiang river nearby it. Flower lines the square with various flowers,filling the air with sweet scents.It features clear river,wide square and colorful light at night,which is a feast for the eyes,so a lot of lovers like appointment in here. People travels in here as soon as Happy New year.What fun traveling it go to here！
