文中词汇表达贫乏,但是单词拼写做的不错;如若增加一些长难句的使用,会为文章添彩;层次不清晰,几乎没有使用衔接词。
Bamboo Dance was an ancient way of Li people’s sacrifice.Hundred years ago,Li people will be dressing,cooking,drinking and sacrificing when they get the celebration by hard working.After drinking ,they will get to the hillside.They dance the Bamboo Dance in the fire to celebrate the harvest and hope to have a good harvest in the new year.Bamboo Dance from the first of new year to the Lantern Festival.Every day people will turn on the light all night and dance.They will be happy in these day.
人气:45发布:2016-11-29
人气:56发布:2016-04-05
人气:56发布:2014-03-04