作者使用词汇表达不够灵活,需要多使用一些高级词汇;加强一些长句和复杂句的使用;不能熟练使用过渡词,文章结构欠佳。
Everyone has a hobby. My hobby is play football. This is my favorite sport. I think that playing football is very interesting. Whydo I like play football? Because I have an experience. One day, on my way to my home, I picked up a football, so I played soccer with my classmates. Finally, I fell in love with piaying soccer. These days, I often play competitions about the football with my friends. I think that it is fun for me to play soccer with them. I love Bei ke han mu, a football star. he comes from England. I want to become a professional football player like him.