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语句间的衔接成分用的不错，同时文章中的过程性词汇很丰富；熟练使用了一些长难句；请作者仔细检查词汇的拼写，同时高级词汇量还要多多积累。
june 14 2016 dear Xiao Ming i am so glad to hear that you will come to see me during the week-long holiday,i even can't wait to see you, i've made a plan for our holiday,i will take you to visit the Jie Fang road and Heng mountian.first we will go to Jie Fang road which is located in HengYang city center, it is the most prosperous and busy block in this city ,of couse we can eat delicious and characteristic stree food and buy various things in here .We shouldn't miss the local specialty food especially the 'Yu Feng' it is kind of rise noodles but the difference is what we cook the fish with noodles ,i very love it particularly the soup,I bet you will love it. the second scenery spot is famous Heng mountain which is the highest in Hu Nan province and located in Nan Yue district .There are countless temples in here and every year many buddhists visit in here .I remmeber three years ago, i and my schoolmates spend over 6 hours for climbing this mountian and you will find many interesting things when you are climbing even if the prossce of climbing is very diffcult.when you stay the 'Zu LONG' peak that is the top of Heng mountain you will see the whole view and you can enjor the sunset and sunrise you will have a good time in here
