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句法知识很棒，若增加一些从句的使用，文章会更出色；作者能较熟练、灵活地使用词汇，建议要多使用高级词汇；文章结构不够严谨，应增加过程性词汇的使用。
Welcome to my hometown, John! I have made a perfect plan before you arrived here. First day, I would take you to our Hero Park. This is ancient and famous park that memorize our heroes who against with Japan territories for protecting our hometown and sacrified their lives. Second day, we will go to a famous restaurant in our small town. This restaurant is very special and unique. You can taste the most traditional northeastern food. I have to say nothing else is more delicious than it! Last day, we can go to Wangjie Square after dinner. There is the most lively place. You can feel people's passion and can't help attending their dance. What a pity that you can just stay here for three days.If you live in my hometown, you would must be fall in love with this small but beautiful town.
