增加一些从句的使用,文章会更不错;作者能较灵活地使用词汇表达,但要多积累高级词汇;衔接成分太少,文章结构欠佳。
Hello! I am Jane. Come and see my father's day. In the morning, he usually gets up early. Then he cooks breakfast. Because he wanted my mother to sleep a little longer. After that, he often goes to work by car. He is always very busy. When he doesn't go home for lunch, my mother was worried. But he never comes home late. Sometimes he watchesTV in the evening. This is my father's day. What about your father? Can you tell me?