文章层次较为清晰;作者能较准确地使用丰富的词汇,但请认真检查词汇的拼写;部分句子偏简单,注意有错误的句子。
welcome to my hometown-shanghai.let me do your tour to introuduce some interesting places.I hope you have a wonderful time in china. Fist of all,mingzhu tower is well-known around world .If you stand there you can visit all shanghai city to have a eyes feast. Next it is huangpu river.Everyday there are many foregines to walk around. It is a beautiful river not only the clear water but also the huge yacht.So you would better come to here in summer ,then you can sit the yacht to get rid of the heat.Last place I think it is should most students favorite which full with delicious fun.It is chenghuang temple that vary has the history of the place. That is all I want to tell you.Have a good time in my hometown.