托福独立写作模拟题:关于金钱

语句间的衔接成分用得不错，同时文章中的过程性词汇很丰富；从句使用很不错，再接再厉；作者能较恰当使用丰富词汇，在高级词汇方面希望能更熟练一些

Many people believe that it is important to make large amounts of money, while others are satisfied to earn a comfortable living, in my opinion I more flavor the one which are satisfied to earn a comfortable living. It is okay for a person makeing large number of money if he with a kind motivation. He can use his money to help the people who are disability to live,also he can contribution his money to improve the condition of education. But when people make money just for themselves to get extravagent, it will get themslves more greedy and twisty. On the other hand, if people are satisfied to earn a comfortable living, I think they at least not the pressure of the social, and they can live by themselves and don't need to ake people for help. And most important thing is that they didn't waste the source of social. Eventually, I think money is a tool for people buy goods they want, so I prefer to make money just make me comfortable , that is all I want.