词汇表达不够丰富,要增加高级词汇的使用;文章结构严谨,有效地使用了语句间的衔接成分;文中从句使用不丰富。
My grandfather at the age 76, he very old. He like Autumn, because he like yellow leaf. And he like take a walk with grandmother. He hus a lot of wrinkle and white hair. He hus same brown clothes and green shoes, he vary like wear that. He like me is very much, and I also often help grandfather, for example: I usually at night help grandfather wash the dishes. I like my grandfather!