作者词汇表达较丰富准确,不过学术词汇的积累还有很大的空间;若增加一些从句的使用,文章会更不错;层次不清晰,几乎没有使用衔接词;请注意分段;连词使用偏少。
To:John@163.com From:Tomsmith@hotmail.com Dear John, I am the general manager of sales department in Fox Electronic Comply,I am honored on behalf of our company to inform you that the meeting is scheduled on June,20th,and the launched date of new product and advertising campaign will be discussed then.Please let me know if it would be convenient to you or contact me to offer our arrangement. Hope we can establish a long-term coorpetive relationship with you Best regards, Tom Smith