采用了简单的衔接手法,行文流畅;增加一些从句的使用,文章会更棒;文中词汇表达不灵活,同时存在拼写错误。
My hometown is perfect because the air is very clear. My hometown have builded many mood because we sale it. The river is clear too, there have many fish happily to swim.Not only the building is economic stree is crown,but also the human is hard live. Happily,the high building is all over my hometown, cars cross road.Sadily, the enviroment of dustry is very late, the mood is decreasing,the fish is disappear.So, the solve of the demage og the pollution is very urgency.