简单句型过多,从句使用不熟练;作者能较灵活地使用词汇表达,但要多积累学术词汇;可适当增加连接词和衔接词的使用;请注意分段。
Years ago, my town was a beautiful place.There are many trees around my town.Water in the river is extremely clean and many fish swimming in it.The houses are low and the streets are narrow. Prople's life is different. But now,tall buildings and stores here and there, numbers of cars on the roads.However the everionment is very dreadful, trees are less than before and the fishes are died out.It needs to be handled immediately.