词汇表达灵活丰富请继续保持,也能较好的使用一定的高级词汇;加强一些长句和复杂句的使用;文中基本没有过渡词和衔接词,建议增加衔接词汇的积累。
i borned on a beautiful city with sea and beach ,haikou.It doesn't to process long history or ancient matter.Nvertheless,there are green tree and fresh air and warm circumstance.There is different from big city,Resident's life easy and confortable.As far as i'm concerned,There are three interestingplace i would like to take my friend to see. First,jiefang road.It is young man‘s favourate place.You can buy anything fashion products here.Second,haikou park.In the evening,you can see the crowed old man in the park and dancing.You can feel their energy.Third,shiji bridge.It is a landmark building in haikou. I hope my friend can feel the beauty of my hometown.