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字数:300 满分:100分
句法方面做得很棒,但是从句不多;作者要注意增加使用高级词汇,单词拼写做的挺好;文章层次较为清晰。
One winter day, on my back one home, there came a heavy rain. Forgetting to bring the umbrella, I had to run through the rain and hurriedly looked for a shelter. Fortunately, there was a range of stores with a big roof and some fellow-sufferers were waiting for me. Seeing me covered with rain rush up the steps, they quickly left a room and then unconsciously took a small step back, again. Spinning around, I found it not crowed at all in fact and if we got a little gathering, maybe there was more spare room for other people and we could also be a bit warmer. Nevertheless everyone fixed on their phones and rooted in their own areas. The wind howled and it became a downpour. It was so cold for me that I went in one bookstore. It seemed this bookstore met a good time. The landlady ran around here and there, grinned and enraptured to talk with customers. She looked more than 40 years old, small eyes with a round mask, a blank purse across one shoulder, and her greasy fingers were counting the paper money. All of these proved her a shrewd businesswoman. I went inside and casually chose a book with a warm color cover. I sat down and fell into the wonderful world in the book quickly. Time flies, the crowded gradually melted away. It seemed the rain stopped, but I was in deep attract by this book. Even though I knew almost every bookstore owner disliked those who just read books, I wanted to leave later because I just had not enough money to buy it. Unfortunately, with the sound of footsteps, I saw a pair of high heels going straight to me. This woman must want to drive me away, I thought. No wonder the old saying went: merchant just value profit. Why did she hold a paper cup not a feather duster? I stood consciously to leave, but suddenly, a warm current went into my palm and through my heart.