文章词汇表达多样请继续保持,也能较准确地使用高级词汇,文中衔接词和过渡词使用的很棒;从句使用很不错,再接再厉。
With the development of the internet ,a increasing number of people can now be seen studying online instead of attending school,which brings about a concern to the public. When we come to the adult,it is convenient for them to develop skills,because they can acquire new knowledge when they work on the day.For example, my brother Gorge,a engineer who often studies online.He told me that it saves him lots of time and energy to get new skills.In case of education of teenagers,I hold the view that it is not beneficial for the teenagers to extend their social network.For instance , my little sister Linda,a middle school student,who often told me that she can make new friends and learn new things in the school. Such a trend,as it seems to me,I think that it not only can facilitate the acquisition of knowledge and let new light through another window,but also make recognition and acceptance be at risk when we ignore the importance of studying in the school.I do hope that we study online but also in the school.