可适当增加连接词和衔接词的使用;采用了一些简单的从句;文中缺乏丰富的词汇表达,但词汇拼写要更加认真;请注意分段;连词使用偏少。
As Joseph Epstein, a famous American writer said,the different choice and decisions made by ourselves decide who you are. and the ambition palys a inportant role. As the Napoleon once said" the soldier who do not want to be a general is not a good one". we can see that the great ambition of Napoleon. and it is no doubt that he try his best to fullfilt his dream and become a hero in that time