采用了适当的衔接手法,层次清晰;作者句法知识扎实,但从句稍微偏少;作者词汇基础很好,也能较灵活使用高级词汇,望继续努力。
Should college students hire cleaners? No, they wouldn't be allowed to do that. From my point of view, it's a behavior that couldn't be encouraged. Dorm is a public area for six dorm mates and everyone should take responsibility to clean their common house. Although there are lots of reasons that you choose not to clean your dorm, like pressure of exam weeks. What I want to say is that dorm should be cleaned by ourselves. First of all, if you don't clean your own area, you can't be regarded as a person who is responsible. As an old saying in China, 'you can't be successful if you ignore cleaning your house.' which was telling an old story about a man who was too lazy to clean his own house but he just said he was busy making success. However, no one will be willing to visit him because his mess house. Currently, we college students can not just study theories, but also study how to develop our own character. Cleaning will be a good choice for us to form a good habit. Cleaning dorm by ourselves can bring more closing relationship among dorm mates. What's more, according to biology research, suitable housework can keep you a good motion and add quite a few energy. In conclusion, hire cleaners is not a good choice for students, why not we cleaning dorms by ourselves?