可适当增加长句和复杂句的使用;作者能较灵活地使用词汇表达,但要多积累学术词汇;全文结构较为严谨,应适当增加文中衔接词的使用;请注意分段。
I like English best,because, It can bring me enjoyment and success. Let me tell you about my stroy. First,When I was six years old,I remember sitting close to the radio, listening to my favourite English stories and to the voice of my favourite presenters ,it seemed that they were speaking to me in person.After that,I have found I like English . second,when I was ten years ,I have a dream ,It's America dream ,because,I hope to see the whole of American.As I grow old,my interested in English grow . While I am speaking English, I will feel happy and exciting.In my opinion,It's important for me to speak English.As soon as I speak English,I will feel the world is myself. In spite of there many difficulties,I still have a dream,It's my English dream.so you know,what's my favourite dream?