采用了恰当的衔接手法,层次清晰;作者词汇基本功很好,高级词汇表达也比较恰当;作者句法基础较为扎实。
According to the passage, it's easy to find that we were happy when we were in our childhood for we can do whatever we want to do in our spare time. Whereas, as time goes by, we are becoming less happy because of various worries and pressures.It's unlikely that we can feel ease and free just like kids. On the contrary, what we need to do is to tackle various problems we are facing. As far as I am aware,growing up is not happy. In the first place, as we are grown-ups, we should take responsibility for what we've done, no matter big or small. In addition, it's likely that we must study hard to get good grades so that we can live up to parents' expectations. Otherwise, we will be punished by our teachers as well as parents. Furthermore, as adults, it's necessary for us to make money to support ourselves or even a family. In other words, we will face financial burden, which is bound to make us feel unhappy and stressful. Despite of all kinds of burdens and worries in adulthood, we shouldn't give up pursuing what we want to accomplish,instead, we should make great efforts to fulfill our values and dreams.