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文中词汇表达比较多样，能多用学术词汇就更好了；句法知识很棒，若增加一些从句的使用，文章会更出色；文章层次不够分明，缺少组织，需注意文章整体的组织结构。
Nowadays most of the products are on excessive packaging and this phenomenon contribute to a heated discussion. All the excessive packaging products are looks exquisite and has a high price.Actually,the excessive packaging products price is not equal to its value.It is commonly believed that in one hand the reason why those products has the market is the people's vain.They need something as a gift to their friends,boss and relatives.So they are satisfied with the products which on excessive packaging.It is exquisite and expensive that can show their respect to the people who get the gift.In other hand,if the merchant want to get more profits,they must draw the customer's attention and the package must be delicate.So they spended more times focus on the package and ignored the products equality. As far as I concerned,with the remarkable improvement of people's life standard,many ads and product makes our eyes confused. But Never judge people by their appearance. so is products.the merchant should focus on produts equality.because a good reputation is more value than a excessive packaging.And every one should know the most expensive could not be the best.People should retrain the behavior of comparison.
