从句数量不足,可适当增加从句和复杂句的使用;文中有几处拼写错误,应增加高级词汇的使用;上下文衔接不流畅,文章结构不严谨。
Is a busy day for me. The sun arises and the day beginning, at 9 am now. My mother call me to help her do some homework when I am sleeping, I am too tired because last night I am insomnia, but I listened to and have to obediently for my mother words. I am clear my house and cooked food. Then to do my task,the teacher are arrange many homework,i dont like it. Afternoon, I play ping-pong with my classmate. And then I go to take a nap until my mom calling me to eat dinner, I wake up. At 9 o`colck i watch TV with my family,it is a hormony home. How enriching the day are.