词汇表达不够丰富,要增加高级词汇的使用;句法知识掌握不错,但文中从句数量偏少;可适当增加连接词和衔接词的使用。
I met my good friend in the park. She is a girl with red and blue pants, she likes playing the guitar, but I don't like. then, she wants to play computer game, i want it too, we go home together to play computer game. She and I are happy, than, evening is coming, she goes home.