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行文稍显不流畅，应增加文中衔接词的使用；能够使用一些不错的从句；作者学术词汇的积累还有很大的空间，词汇表达灵活性也要提高，单词拼写错误较多。
China is a large country consist of fifty six nationalities. among which there are many minority nationalities ,therefore,there is no doubt ,there are kinds of dialects .but are dialects just as acceptable in public place? in my opinion,dialect is not acceptable and even not welcome in public place.as I mentioned above ,there are various dialect so that is not possible for everyone to learn each dialect or not even to use them. To be fair ,our government establish the policy that everybody speak mandery in pubilc place to let communication go smoothly and to show respect to others. hence,in order to avoid the misunderstanding and make everyone invloved in convetsation informed ,mandarian is official language and dialect is not acceptable . To conclude my piont, in order to build a harmonious conversation atmosphere ,and let every body enjoy communication exchange with others . please hide your dilect in pubilc and try your best to speak mandery. thanks .
