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拼写很棒，可适当增加学术词汇的使用；文章结构不够严谨，应增加过程性词汇的使用；采用了一些简单的从句。
Should College Student Hire Cleaners? There is a heated debate that students shared a dorm at a local university hired a cleaner to do laundry and cleaning once a week recently. Someone hold that it is a good idea to help students to solve some problems in life, because students have a plenty of tasks and homework, and they don't have spare time to deal with problems in life. However, some people think it isn't adaptable that college students hire cleaners. And in my opinion, college students hire cleaner have more shortcomings than benefits. Here is my views. First of all, hiring cleaners need some money, and our parents work harder to upbringing us. We should save money and we have no reason to waste money. Secondly, as a student, cleaning dorm, washing clothes are some things that we have ability to do.Hiring cleaners is bad for upbringing our independent competence, conversely, it will let us become more and more lazy. Thirdly, college students hire cleaners might have passive influence to other people. As far as i concerned, students hire cleaners to help them to sweep their dorms, which isn't good for their growth.They should need to deal with daily things by themselves independently.
