从句偏少,建议平时练习中加大单词的记忆;文章结构不够严谨,应增加过程性词汇的使用;文章词汇表达不够丰富,在拼写方面也要继续努力;请注意分段。
Piaying football is my favorite sport.When I was young,I picked up a football in my way to home by chance . I piayed football with my friends,and then I was fall in love with soccer. I usully train soccer and match with friends after class.We get much happiness on the soccer.My favorite football star is David Beckham.My dream is becoming a professional football piayer as well as David Beckham.I think if I practice football hard,I will realize my dream someday.