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拼写很棒，可适当增加学术词汇的使用；有句法错误，句子形式单一；衔接成分很少出现，文章结构欠严谨；请注意分段。
college is not like high school where we have to do too much practice to get high grade .in the college ,we have much time belonging to ourselves .we can do what we want to do.of course,we can stay at our dormitory to have a good rest.because we are really tired on weekdays.this is a good chance for us to sleep and be on online .however ,we find it is boring at some time.so ,why not go out? go out to take part in some extracurricular activities.by them ,we can spend our free time .by them ,we can seek happiness....................every person can not exist on the world lonely .when we have trouble ,we need others help. when we fail , we need others inspire us .when we do something ,we need others provide us things we have not .if we want things done well ,we always need corporation .so ,we are supposed to get friends.taking active in extracurricular activities can help us get many good friends. only this ,we can build a good relations with others .........as we know ,college is a learning place .but,in class ,we only learn standard knowledge .however ,the society ask for people who have developed in variable sections ,who has all kinds of kills . when we attend extracurricular activities ,we can improve ourselves .learn to communicate with others ,learn to be brave to show ourselves in others.learn to solve problem that suddenly happen.
