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文中词汇表达比较多样，能多用学术词汇就更好了；采用了一些简单的从句；层次不清晰，几乎没有使用衔接词。
With economic quick development,people like go shopping in their leisurely time.But,in modern society,more of the young people love Online shopping in their finished a day's work.Online shopping is a popular and fashion things for the increase number of younger people.This phenomenon have lot of reason. Firstly, people's busy to doing something when their begin to do a new work or a new plan.Most of the people have to do housework at weekend,so that they have no time go shopping.secondly,we have to go shopping spend a lot of time and not make ours to feel comfortable. With knowledge accumulate and computer be used in our daytime,Online shopping is becoming a popular things.This is good said. Because it help our to save time and we can to do things in every time.We can do this things in office or at home and so on.It not only comfortable and also fast than go shopping in a street. In term of this reason,we find that more and more people love shopping with computer.But we know that ever coins have two sides.Online shopping made our spend more money than we not do it. Sometime things not in my plan or we are not feeling we spend a lot of money. In my opinion,we should study Online shopping to save time,let's me feel more happier and comfortable and not dependent on this way.We should spend money in our ability space.Only make our happy we can by a kind of way.
