文中词汇表达比较多样,能多用学术词汇就更好了;上下文衔接不流畅,文章结构不严谨;采用了一些简单的从句;请注意分段。
It is all known that the Internet is more and more important for our lives.For example , we chat with others , finish our work , play games , watch TV etc. Abviously, it is useful to make new friends,so it is good for us .But a part of people considers the Internet impact our daily life for useless. The people who think the Internet is useful usually take a plenty of time to enrich their lives.They could visit QQ,Renren that can increase our community.
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