文中句子错误比较多;文章结构不错,使用了丰富的衔接词和过渡词;请作者增加词汇丰富度,适当增加学术词汇的使用,拼写错误要努力避免;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开;请注意分段;连词使用偏少。
My views on Online Shopping In the era of information and technology,the Internet is more and more popular,with that the online shopping has become a fashon. Online shopping has played an important role in our life,it has many advantages ,such as it save lots of time to go to all shopping mall to select a wonderful clothes and it also decrese the