运用了一些简单从句,但不是很熟练;请作者注意词汇表达多样性,但请加强单词拼写的检查;文中很少出现过渡词和衔接词;请注意分段;连词使用偏少。
now,Online shopping is very populayity activity . Move and move people like buy something in onlie .with jiust a click the mouth .shoppers can buy product any oline .We can benefit a lot from shopping oline .TO begin with ,it brings us convient in shopping ,because it goods kinds is greats.so we have more choice us like .Fourthermore,it save us time and money.genelation oline shopping very inexpensive. it cen adopt lots people .so it appeal us cencre about.