若加强一些复杂句和从句的使用,文章会更棒;文中词汇丰富度不足,拼写检查也要重视;连接词过少,建议增加衔接词汇的积累;请注意分段;连词使用偏少。
Hello everybody,My name is tom.Now,I would like to talk about you about my life rults.Every mourning I get up at 6:00.Then I wash my face and have breakfast.I go to school at 6:15.When I leave my house,my mother always says:"Do not eat outside,it is bad for your health.Do not listen to music on school day.It is bad for your study.Do not watch TV on school nights.It is bad for your eyes."We have 4 classes in zhe morning and 3 classes in the afternoon.I back home by 12:00 in the morning and by 9:20 in the evening.When I go back home at night,I doing my homework every night.We have too much homework and I always feel sleepy.