单词拼写做的很好,请注意积累词汇量;句法知识较好,但需加强句式变化;层次不清晰,几乎没有使用衔接词;请注意分段;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开;连词使用偏少。
yesterday,Sam get up at 6 o'clock. than he rode the bike went to the park, he played in the park very happy. noon, he with his parents in the Mc Donald's ate lunch. in afternoon, Sam with his classmate in the school played basketball, he played 4 o'clock until 6 o'clock. after dinner , Sam with his father go for a walk, his father buy a CD for he . this day Sam is very interesting!