文中词汇表达比较多样,能多用学术词汇就更好了;作者应在平时练习中加强复杂句的练习;衔接成分太少,文章结构欠佳;请注意分段。
Hello, everybody! I am glad to stand here and introduce myself. I am XXX and my English name is XXX. I am eleven years old. My birthday is on Christmas Day. I am a student of Grade 6, Class 1 of Ruhe New District Primary School. I like to play violin, reading, swimming, skiing and surfing the internet.I have a lot of hobbies! The color I like best is silver. My favorite food is hamburger. When I grow up, I want to be a writer. I want to write many books that are useful to people. Thank you very much for listening to me. Thank you once again!