作者词汇量偏少,不过单词拼写方面做的不错;文中应增加一些长难句的使用,会为文章添彩;文章层次较为清晰;请注意分段。
playing football, which is my best favorite in my childhood. sometime, I love the football was by a chance, which I was picking a football in my way to home. in the next days, I often play with my friends after class.as the time fly, I found that I was deeply love this sport. in my spare time, i often trains and match with my classmates. bakehame, the star of football in England,who is my most like star.my biggest wish is to become to a professional football player.