单词拼写做的很好,请注意积累词汇量;可适当增加从句的使用,注意文中的一些小错误;没有能够有效地使用连接词和过渡词;请注意分段;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开。
My busy day I had a busy day yesterday.First ,I finished my homework in my room.Then,I practised the piano in the living room,and I played it well.Next,I did the housework with my parents,we swept the floor and washed the clothes.After that,I went shopping with my mother,we bought a lot of things. What a busy day!