单词拼写做的很棒,还请注意增加词汇的积累;句法知识很棒,若增加一些从句的使用,文章会更出色;层次不清晰,几乎没有使用衔接词;请注意分段;可以适当增加副词的使用;连词使用偏少。
Sam had a funny day yesterday.He got up at 6:00 yesterday morning.Then he went to the park by bike,he was happy there.At noon,he ate McDonald's with his parents.In the afternoon,Sam played basketball with his classmates,they played it from 4:00 till 6:00.After dinner,he went for a walk with his father,his father bought a CD for him. What a funny day!