增加一些从句的使用,文章会更棒;文中缺乏丰富的词汇表达,但词汇拼写要更加认真;过渡词和衔接词使用不恰当,缺少组织,可适当增加连接词的使用;请注意分段;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开;连词使用偏少。
Sam gets up at six o 'clock yesterday.Then go to the park by bike,He plays happyness in the park。Noon,he and parents eat lunch at the McDonald’s. Atfernoon Sam and his classmates play basketball in the school,play from 4 pm until at 6 pm.after dinner,Sam and his father go for a walk ,his father bought him a piece of classical muisc CD.This day Sam had how intresting.