若加强一些复杂句和从句的使用,文章会更棒;文中用词稍显贫乏,在词汇拼写也要再接再厉;语言不流畅;连词使用偏少;请注意分段;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开。
Sam get up bed in six o'clock yesterday.However he gone to the park by bike.he have lunch in the McDonald's with parents at noon.afternoon Sam have a play basketball with his classmate in the school,since afternoon four o'clock till afternoon six o'clock.After dinner,Sam and his father go for a walk together.Father buy a piece of classic muisc CD for him.How a Sam's day is intering!