文中单词拼写做的很棒,再多积累些词汇就更好了;加强一些长句和复杂句的使用;语言不流畅;连词使用偏少;请注意分段;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开。
I am Sam.I get up at six o'clock yesterday morning.Then I rode my bike went to the park.I had fun in the park.I had lunch in McDonald’s with my parents at noon.Then I played basketball that I had happy with my classmates in our school.I had this sport from four o'cock P.M. to six o'clock P.M..this sport is good for our health.After dinner,my father and I went for a walk.My father bought a Classical music CD.What a interesting day!