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初一英语作文模拟题:我的理想

发布时间:2013-05-16 14:56浏览次数:2027
要求:
以“我的理想”写一篇作文。
要求句子通顺,语法正确,卷面干净,书写规范。
要求不少于60个单词。
用户的作文(系统评分68.5分
评语:

作者词汇表达丰富度要继续提升,学术词汇使用过少;可适当增加从句和长句的使用;文章结构不够严谨,应增加过程性词汇的使用。

用户练习作文:

When I grow up,I want to be who I want to .I want to be a game programmer because it’s really interesting and I like playing computer games.To be a game programmer,I can make a lot of games what I want to make. After the job,I want to talk to my family.I want to have a wife who can care about families and give me lots of love.Then I want to have two children,which one is a son the other is a daughter.This is my beautiful family. In twenty years,I'll live in where a place can make me joyful.I like Japan remarkably much because I think Japan is a country which has extremely colorful history.So in twenty years,I'll live in Tokyo or Osaka in Japan with my families. This is nice dream!

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