文中用词稍显贫乏,单词拼写还要加强;上下文衔接欠佳,文章层次欠清晰,建议加强连接词和衔接词的积累;多多加强从句和复杂句的使用。
San yesterday six o'clock get up .and then by bike went to park,he so happy in park. a noon,he and he parents in McDonald's ate lunch. afternoon sam and he friend played basketball in school. After dinner,Sam and he's father, gofor a walk, he's father buy CD, the day ,Sam