文中词汇表达多样性不足,在学术词汇方面尤其要多积累;从句使用不熟练;过渡词和衔接词使用不恰当,缺少组织,可适当增加连接词的使用。
Tom is a middle school student.In order to his studies, he worked out a series of plans. First,he will get up at six o'clock,then wash.He will go to school at 6:15.He usually eat breakfast on the road.Because it's can save time. Next don't eat outside.Don't listen to music on school days,because it's will influence on his study.In order to protect the eyes.Don’t watch TV on school nights.And go back home by 12:00 in the morning and by 9:20 in the evening.So that he can study hard.