文中衔接词和过渡词使用的很棒;文中应适当增加从句和长难句的使用;作者词汇表达不够多样,希望能多使用高级词汇。
Tom is a good student,he has many rules,but these are good for him.For example,he gets up at 6:00,after washing,he usually goes to school in 15 minutes.He is clean,so he never eats outside.Durning the time at school,Tom not only don't listen to the music,but also don't watch TV.Finally he will be back home by 12:00 in the morning and by 9:20 in the evening.