但从句使用不熟练,注意平时练习中多积累;作者词汇量偏小,另外文章有些单词拼写错误;上下文衔接欠佳,文章层次欠清晰,建议加强连接词和衔接词的积累;请注意分段;请提高文章内敛性,段落和句子要围绕主题展开;可以适当增加副词的使用。
Sam got up at 6 o'clock. then he went to the park by bike.he played so happy in the park.he had lunch with his parents in McDonald's at noon .Sam and his classmates played basketball in the school from 4 o'clock till 6 o'clock this afternoon.Sam and his father went for a walk after dinner. His father bought a musical CD for him.how fun is Sam the aii day!