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文中词汇表达比较多样，能多用高级词汇就更好了；若加强一些复杂句和从句的使用，文章会更棒；衔接成分太少，文章结构欠佳。
Sam woke up at six o'clock yesterday. Than he rode bike to the park, and had a very nice day there. His families walked around the park and enjoyed the beautiful scene. When it was lunch time, he and his parents ate in McDonald's, the food was delicious. Sam played basketball with his classmates from four PM till six PM. After dinner, Sam went for a walk with his father, and they talked freely. Finally, his farther bought a classical CD for him. What a funny day Sam had!
